Walking on Knives

Self hatred every minute of all days but no one must know or the dirt that is inches thick that is hidden under a blanket of faces might be noticed. Sitting in a bloated stretched skin bursting fat into knowing shoes that this time fit. Finger nails cracked and zig zagged which scrape against the top lip in a frenzy of comfort. Panic a mirror looms and ugliness detected to encourage sick swirling pure dislike of the person the body inhabits. Grateful to acknowledgement for acceptance. Laughter sneering ignoring telling of the unimportance held. Heart racing as speech stumbles and fails. Get it over say anything move quickly away. Judgements of hatred levels or dismissal flashing through every eye blink. Regret for mistakes and wrongness foams shakes pulses through allotted being. Scum dirt filth stink dislike a blob inhabiting a space. Left behind forgotten dismissed by love. Loyalty from cloth ears. The fear the wretched state no escape and blisters scream. Crying out the green slime ice chunk melting thoughts to nothingness. Trying to make right to give...taken. Concrete chest weight for standing has no cracks. Defect to default.